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Johnny Black, Smash Hits, 9 June 1983

I ARRIVE, two hours late, outside a church in North London. I push open the huge wooden door and find myself being smiled at by Dave Stewart, looking a lot less ominous than he does in pictures. "You must be Johnny Black," he tells me, inviting me in. "It’s my new religion, Blackism."

Total word count of piece: 1221