No Smoking, no Drinking — no Wonder the Bay City Rollers are... Pictures of Health!
Chris Welch, Melody Maker, 22 February 1975
"I'M SORRY, sir, you can't smoke in here." A matronly figure approached a table, where the MM was partaking of sugar-free fruit cake and unsweetened tea, and made an unmistakable gesture.
Total word count of piece: 1648